Chapter 2

The time I almost had the chance to climb Mount Everest.

Let me clarify a bit more on that statement: I never once had the opportunity to climb Mount Everest. Nor did I ever have the potential for the opportunity to climb Mount Everest. This is the story of the time that I almost and the opportunity to almost have the chance to climb Mount Everest. It’s sort of like when you hear the news of your uncle’s, best friend’s, dad’s, brother’s, wife’s, grandchild’s, neighbor receive a lot of money in the lottery recently, and they would be incredibly excited about it telling anyone they saw.

This is exactly what happened to me these last few weeks. His name was Jerry, and we met for the first time at the nearby CVS Pharmacy. He was a tall man, but obviously not as tall as the tallest mountain in the world. That would be impossible. He was wearing a plain, light grey t-shirt and brown cargo shorts. That type of outfit is perfect for the summer, but if he wanted to go climbing he should have been wearing about three layers of clothing, climbing gear, heavy boots, a backpack, and a helmet. I didn’t know if he wanted to go climbing, but he certainly wanted to buy something at CVS Pharmacy.

As soon as he walked in, he instantly started talking to everyone there about how he recently won the lottery, and after taxes he won exactly $14,514.50. He would not stop talking about this number, and I remember thinking that the total height of Mount Everest from sea level is exactly twice that much. He seemed happy to have this money, and I couldn’t blame him. I don’t know what I would do with that amount of money, maybe I’d buy a nice video camera or something.

I remember that Jerry told me that he wanted to go scuba diving, because he always wanted to and could never afford it before. He sounded both terrified and excited at the same time. He’s had a huge fear of swimming ever since he was a child, and now he can work through that fear. I don’t know if he has a fear of heights or not.

I thought that was pretty brave, almost as brave as Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Norgay were when they both successfully climbed Mount Everest back in 1953. They even received a knighthood by the Queen when they returned to their country.

Jerry was not knighted, nor would he ever be, because he was born in America, but Jerry didn’t seem bothered by that fact. He was too excited about saying how he was going to see many different underwater creatures on his scuba trip. I’m not a marine biologist so I couldn’t say how many creatures Jerry will see on his scuba trip. I do know that there are no creatures on Mount Everest, due to the extreme cold. It’s possible for the temperatures up there to reach a low of -76ºF.

He left CVS Pharmacy after he bought a scuba mask and some yellow floaties, and he went to the nearby Red Lobster to get a nice meal. He was lucky, buying a meal, because most people climbing Mount Everest have to bring an oxygen tank and mask to be able to breathe easily in a high altitude. He needs the same thing to go underwater, but he needs a different mask than the one he bought to climb any tall mountain.

I hope Jerry was able to enjoy his trip, and when Jerry goes on his trip he should leave sometime during May, before the summer monsoon season. As the monsoon season approaches, the jet stream shifts northward, thereby reducing the average wind speeds high on the mountain. It’s the easiest time to climb, and the most popular. Jerry will not be climbing, but it’s probably easier to swim when there isn’t a lot of waves pushing you everywhere underwater. Hopefully he enjoyed his meal, and he’s able to climb those metaphorical mountains he needs to climb in order to go swimming in those deep oceans.